Scientists from Britain in the field of psychology and sociology have long analyzed how single girls and boys behave when hanging out. Women, to fall in love (or be imbued with sympathy), need at least six glances in the eyes of the interlocutor, evaluate his appearance, manner of communication. This takes about 45 seconds. The men turned out to be faster - 8 seconds, and only one glance is enough for them. And now, a spark has already arisen between people, but doubt arises - is it worth start dating or just hanging out? To find out the exact answer to this question, you need to know the person at least a little.
For the relationship not to become "one of," but to be serious and pleasant for both, you need to ask yourself three questions:
Am I ready for dating?
Is this person right for me?
Is he sincere towards me?
To answer the first question, you need to understand your motives. If you want a relationship for having a good time, a position in society, to forget the past, etc., then you definitely should not start dating seriously. If the motive is sincere sympathy, there is a desire to make the relationship lasting, and then the couple can take place. After all, feelings, especially of another person, are not a toy. You can't disappoint him for your benefit. Answering the second question, you need to figure out if this person is suitable for creating a relationship? Do the partners have similar views, do they see each other as a life companion, do they meet mutual expectations. If so, then "dating" may well develop into "living together" and then into "getting married."
The third question is very important, first of all, for oneself. A person must understand whether the attitude of his companion is really sincere. Does he have "underground" motives? To do this, you need to find out more information about the person. Information about how he behaves in other areas of life will be useful. For example, how he speaks about acquaintances, does he allow himself to lie to close people. If a person is attracted to another and realizes that the answer to all these questions is yes, then it's time to make the first date! Hangout is the only thing that can be done at the beginning of communication. You're just spending time together, without any obligations. In the future, the companion's new character traits and characteristics become known, and it becomes clear whether the couple can date.
Whether it is worth starting dating is a question that worries many girls, especially those who have experienced separation in the past. Several alarming "bells" will tell you that you need to run far away from the guy.
If he speaks unflattering about ex-girls, describes their shortcomings, and does not admit his own mistakes in past relationships. First, he chose his exes himself. Secondly, he is also to blame because there are no conflicts where only one side is guilty.
Guys who, a few days after they met, hint at intimate closeness openly, want a kiss too quickly, open their hands - not the best option for a serious relationship as well as those that promise "mountains of gold" from the very beginning. Normal men silently take and do, and do not chat ("I love you" - just typical of guys without serious intentions).
If during a walk, a guy and a girl paid for themselves, that's okay. But if he asks for a date and thinks who ate how much, it is not worth dating.
You should also be wary of those young people who:
Communicate with ex
They are mostly friends with girls
Caught in lies, even the smallest
The stronger intimate desire does not always think about starting dating, especially if the girl is beautiful. But there are types with whom the relationship is fraught with difficulties, and it is better to be just friends.
Too obsessive girls who talk about children and make plans for the future right after the first meeting. They cease to be an individual, which means that in a relationship, they will become a simple shadow of a guy, or "sticky."
Very jealous, and owners may even like them at first. But would it be pleasant to listen to jealous injections if she noticed a correspondence with a classmate or alike on a social network? Those of the fair girls who like to flirt and hang out with other guys are also not the best option for a relationship. If she demands a lot or immediately pays attention to the guy's material values and not the character and attitude towards her, the relationship will most likely not work. Therefore, you should not start them.
Such traits can be noticed from the first days of communication. If you stop in time and simply do not move from the "Friends" stage to the "Dating" stage, you can avoid many troubles in the future.
We become attached to many people throughout our lives. We are looking for those who can be trusted, with whom no difficulties are terrible. However, such people are very difficult to meet. And while we are looking for the "those," we manage to become attached to the "wrong" ones. Each break is difficult, especially if the person has already got used to the partner.
It is especially difficult to cope with the fact that all friends, acquaintances have achieved success in a relationship, and you have not. They seem to have found the love of their lives on the first try and are happy to the point of exhaustion. So when you go out on a date with someone you like, there is a danger of getting attached too quickly - and intimate closeness makes it worse.
What should be done to not initially become attached to a person and understand if this is the applicant for the heart you are looking for? Indeed, often in such cases, it turns out that after a break, it is impossible to resume normal life, and then a person realizes that his whole life was built around the one who left.
Instead of trying to lure someone into your bed as quickly as possible, you should take the time to communicate with the other person and hang out together. A strong emotional connection must precede a physical one - then everything will be in order. Intimate closeness is an expression of intimacy and love, but it is not love. Physical attractiveness is extremely strong, so it is difficult for intimate closenessual desires to resist the mind, which says: "dare." But to start serious relationships, you need to resist.
But if you are really interested in establishing a real and lasting relationship, you probably don't want to have intimate closeness with a partner right off the bat and then wake up a few weeks later, realizing that you have nothing in common other than physical attraction, which soon begins to evaporate.
While rushing your partner to have intimate closeness, you don't really recognize who is in front of you. If one single thought is stuck in your head - intimate closeness, many emotions caused by passion are distorted. In other words, some habits may initially seem cute, and then, when intimate closeness occurs, interest in a partner fades away. At the same time, cute habits become annoying or even hateful.
Therefore, try to pull yourself together and not get hung up on physical intimacy - emotional intimacy is much more important if there is a desire to build a strong, long-term union.
Think about whether you have become too dependent on your significant other? Are you constantly waiting for a message from her, an appearance on the network, or a call to make sure at least a little that you are needed? Do you constantly check the pages of your loved one on social networks to understand what she is doing, with whom you correspond? Are you angry that you don't get a reply to your message right away?
This is a "sick" addiction, which will become fatal in the construction of interpersonal relationships. The best sanity test is to remind yourself that you didn't even know this person existed a certain amount of time ago. Now that it has appeared in your life, has everyday existence ceased? You should not concentrate all plans around your beloved - you are both people who need a life outside of a couple. Do not change the established way of life - just make some adjustments to it to room for the second half in it.
Relationships with the opposite intimate closeness are a subtle, delicate, and serious topic. Specialists in social psychology are struggling to find the ideal formula for the relationship between a man and a woman. However, it seems to us that it does not exist. It is important to be aware of some of the nuances and secrets that will help solve problems. And we are working diligently to select only useful and necessary advice for you.